Showing hospitality to widows 

By Leela Ramdeen, Chair, CCSJ (http://rcsocialjusticett.org) & Director, CREDI 

On Friday, June 23 the world observed International Widow’s Day. It was first celebrated in 2011 “in an effort to empower widows and help them regain their rights, which have long been ignored and violated. After their husbands have passed, many widows are forced to fight for their human rights and overcome many obstacles to ensure their social and economic development. It is estimated that there are over 245 million widows worldwide, nearly half of which live in extreme poverty and are subject to cruel violence. Vast numbers of women are widowed due to armed conflict. It is estimated that 7–16% of all adult women in the world are widows.” (www.wincalendar.com). 

Becoming a widow impacts not only the woman, but her entire family. Former UN Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon rightly stated that “The 2030 Sustainable Development Agenda with its pledge to leave no one behind has a particular resonance for widows, who are among the most marginalised and isolated…” The UN states that “abuse of widows and their children constitutes one of the most serious violations of human rights and obstacles to development today. Millions of the world’s widows endure extreme poverty, ostracism, violence, homelessness, ill health and discrimination in law and custom.” 

Our scriptures teach us about the importance of widows. God is the “Father of orphans, defender of widows… (Ps 68:5).  Psalm 46: 9 states that God “protects the stranger, he keeps the orphan and widow”.  In Acts 6:1, we see that in the early Church “when the number of disciples was increasing, the Hellenists made a complaint against the Hebrews: ‘in the daily distribution their own widows were being overlooked.’” The disciples held a meeting and seven men of “good reputation, filled with the Spirit and with wisdom” were given the duty to ensure that widows were looked after. 

In Luke 20:46, Jesus condemned the Scribes “who swallow the property of widows…” This reminds me of the state of play here in T&T in the days when Hindu and Muslim marriages were not recognised. My former dentist, now deceased, always complained about the injustice that was meted out to women like his mother, and to children like him. Because such marriages ‘under bamboo’ were not recognised, his father’s property went bona vacantia – to the State. This situation changed with the proclamation of the Hindu Marriage Act, Chapter 45:03 of 1945, and the Muslim Marriage and Divorce Act of 1961. 

Many dioceses in our Church have written pastoral letters on the theme of: ‘Widowed, Separated and Divorced’. In T&T we have a Ministry for men and women in these groups. Visit the following link for a paper I presented in January 2012 at the Archdiocesan Family Life Commission’s Convention for Catholics who are Separated, Divorced and Widowed on the theme: What does God have to do with me now?  

“Separated, divorced and widowed people, through their vulnerability, courage and patient endurance, serve as witnesses to Christ and His redeeming grace” (Diocese of Trenton, New Jersey, USA).  Parish priests/administrators and parishioners must ask themselves: ‘How are separated, divorced, and widowed people treated in this parish? What are our attitudes towards them? What support do we give them during their time of pain and recovery?’ 

Catholics must “seek to create an awareness of the gifts and needs of all who are divorced, separated, and widowed and to give them a sense of belonging within the church community” (St Louis, USA). Let us reach out in solidarity to widows and help them to flourish and grow in our communities. Each one of them will have gifts on which we can draw to build the common good. 

And to the widows in our midst, remember that God wants each of you who suffer the pain and anguish of widowhood, to remain in Him. God never abandons us. He will heal our wounds and strengthen us by His grace. I urge you widows today to believe that God is holding each one of you in the palm of His hand – tenderly, lovingly; nurturing you through your suffering. 

I encourage you to continue to go to Mass; stay active in ministry in your parish. For those of you who have children and grandchildren, God wants you to be strong for them; to do your best to educate and pass on our faith to them. May the Lord soften our hearts to show hospitality to widows in our society. 

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