As the year draws to a close, my family and I have been reflecting in London on the importance of family life. Tomorrow, 29 December, will mark 3 years since my father, Balgobin Ramdeen, former MP (1961-1966), Attorney-at-Law and author, died in London aged 91 years old. My mother, Ruby Ramdeen (nee Manning), who was an exemplar in balancing her work-life balance, died in 1995. She was 66 years old. I thank God for my loving parents and for strong family life. No role is more challenging, more time-consuming and more rewarding than the role of parents. From my own upbringing I can attest to the fact that daily doses of love promote good parenting.
The 1983 Catholic Charter of the Rights of the Family defines family as “a community of love and solidarity, which is uniquely suited to teach and transmit cultural, ethical, social, spiritual and religious values, essential for the development and well-being of its own members and of society” (#229, Compendium ). It is in the family that our young people first learn moral and spiritual values and virtues, which give meaning to their lives. St Pope John Paul II reminded us years ago that: “The future of humanity passes by way of the family”.
Sadly, we live in a time when family life in TT and in many parts of the world is in disarray. In June 2018 I attended the Inaugural national symposium on the family 2018: Supporting families as the bedrock of society – Towards a national family policy for T&T. It listed some of the barriers to an effective family policy as well as some key elements. It incorporated “the official launch of a National Values, Attitudes and Behaviours Campaign for Trinidad and Tobago, which is key to fostering family life and driving sustainable social development.”
The main challenge we have is to create an environment in which family life can flourish. What infrastructure are we building that will enable us to implement any policy that is agreed? As 2020 approaches, let us all strive to strengthen our capacity as a nation to support families. Our nation will only be as strong as the families that live here. How many of our children can say that they live in healthy, happy homes? If we are to realise the vision of building strong families and a strong nation, we should not simply look to government for solutions to our social ills. We must also look to our communities for role models and mentors to encourage, challenge and enthuse those who are at risk.
We can all play our part in building structures of family pastoral care; structures that will help to equip parents with the knowledge, skills and ability to teach their children the great virtues of life such as love, integrity, respect, compassion, responsibility, decency, co-operation, honesty, tolerance, unity, etc.
Each day the media brings to our attention news of child abuse, neglect, incest, human trafficking and other forms of violence that affect the life chances of our children. We cannot afford to sit on the side lines and ignore the many social ills that impact adversely on family life. The Catholic Catechism tells us that: “The family must be helped and defended by appropriate social measures. Where families cannot fulfil their responsibilities, other social bodies have the duty of helping them and of supporting the institution of the family” (#2209, CCC).
Recently I met Mrs Rhonda Gregoire-Roopchand, Deputy Director, Care Services, Children’s Authority who told me that the Authority is looking for families that will foster children. Foster care is “a temporary option for children who are not able to live with their birth families due to a range of different circumstances. The ultimate goal of Foster Care is to provide a safe, stable and nurturing home environment for children until such time that they can be reunited with their family, or until such time that other suitable long-term living arrangements can be made”. See the brochure on: https://www.ttchildren.org/services/foster-care.
And while we pray and act to support families, let us take stock of our own lives at the end of the year. Self-reflection/introspection is important for emotional intelligence.
